Hello, today I finally got enough courage to start getting the house into sale mode. I started in our gross kitchen. I was inspired after I realized that my blinds could actually be washed after about 7 years. I went through all the cupboards and organized our stuff (I want to give the impression that the house has good storage). I also washed the walls, took the stuff of the counter and removed all pictures from the refrigerator. I was impressed in the end of the day that the kitchen actually looked decent. That is if you are not into stainless steel appliances, granite counter tops or a walk in pantry.
Tomorrow we are going to tackle the lawn, flowers and ultimate curb appeal. We have a lot of work to do. I figured if I pick rooms each day, I will just make it before I leave for Harrisburg. It is a good process to come to terms with vacating the house.
We have been receiving a nice reaction about leaving. People generally seem sad that we are moving out of Michigan. We are also excited as the reception coming into PA has been so warm. It is a weird time as we are still half into Michigan and half in PA.
STAGING THE HOUSE
I want to see if the hundreds of hours of watching HGTV will pay off in my knowledge about staging. My husband thinks I am nuts but I am convinced that I am a designer brought in to get this house sold. I have visions of how to lay out the furniture, cover up little issues and find creative ways to use non personal artwork that was not worthy of making the walls before. It's kind of like a Design on a Time and Sell Your House episode.
UPDATE ON MY JOB STATUS
My references and drug screen came back fine and all the company is waiting for is my background check. I don't know why I am nervous. I just think what happens if someone stole my identity and did bad things. Maybe I was off on a date or two. I mean I can't actually remember the exact year I graduated from my Masters Program or the exact amount I was paid at a position 12 years ago. Let's just hope everything works out. I mean as far as I know, I am not a criminal, I did work where I said I did and I did attend and graduate college. I guess I am ok...
REALIZATION
My house is super cute - we fell in love with it when we saw it so there is no reason to believe that someone else will not have the same feelings - at least we hope. Realization 2 - HGTV makes everything seem easy and fast. It took me 7 hours doing unglamorous work and I still have 3 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, 1 office, 1 dinning room and 1 living room and 1 family room and 1 laundry room, 1 garage and a basement to go... oooh that is alot of days. Realization 3 - I am sure my background check is fine ---
Friday, April 30, 2010
Thursday, April 29, 2010
DAY 88 - WHY AM I SO SORE?
I have moved into transition phase where I am thinking of household projects and how to stage the house nicely for sale. I don't want to do anything too drastic until I know that my background check is complete. I am weird about things like this. I also came to the realization that I will be starting work, if all goes alright in a week from Monday. I think I better try to push it back cause I am not sure I am going to get everything done. I was thinking that May 10 was in two weeks when it really is about 10 days.
MASSAGE
I went to get a massage because I joined Massage Envy, which is a monthly plan that offer inexpensive massages. I love it but some how have not kept up and have three massages to take. Listen I am not complaining because I love them. Any opportunity for someone to rub my back and feet - I am taking - no questions asked. I was especially looking forward to it today since I have been running alot and I think I hurt my ankle a little. I usually go to this great gal, but she broke her foot and will be off for another month. I went to a different masseuse thinking everything was fine since I like a ight touch and relaxing opposed to deep muscle. Well, she went to town on me. She was intrigued with my stress balls in my neck and some how leaving I feel very sore. Is that right? I wanted therapeutic and relaxing not car crash and paralysis.
THE KITCHEN
I am picking off one room at a time to get prepared for the sale. I am going to clean it up and stage it. I decided to start with the kitchen. The challenge is that this kitchen has 1967 cabinets and appliances. I thought I would capture the retro charm that is so in style now - or at least I tell myself that. Years ago, I bought window cell shades to allow the light to peek in and provides an airy feeling. I didn't realize how scummy they get from years of food splatter. For years, I have stared at these gross levelers. It occurred to me today, maybe I can clean them? I looked it up on the Internet and there were the directions to remove spots and grime. I went to my local K-Mart (hate this store) and picked up the cleaning products which was generally a white sponge and upholstery cleaner. I was so excited about my find that I tested it on one of the shades. It cleaned up beautifully. So basically I have settled for dirty blinds because I was too stupid to figure out how to clean them. I am gross and my house will look better as we move then when we lived in it = pretty pathetic.
Realization
I guess I should be happy that I can get massages - even a bad one is better than not having one at all. I think I will try someone else next time. I am finding myself doing a lot of head circles and hearing that crunchy noise. Realization two - I need to take better care of my next house but next time you can rest assure that I buy the proper window coverings.
MASSAGE
I went to get a massage because I joined Massage Envy, which is a monthly plan that offer inexpensive massages. I love it but some how have not kept up and have three massages to take. Listen I am not complaining because I love them. Any opportunity for someone to rub my back and feet - I am taking - no questions asked. I was especially looking forward to it today since I have been running alot and I think I hurt my ankle a little. I usually go to this great gal, but she broke her foot and will be off for another month. I went to a different masseuse thinking everything was fine since I like a ight touch and relaxing opposed to deep muscle. Well, she went to town on me. She was intrigued with my stress balls in my neck and some how leaving I feel very sore. Is that right? I wanted therapeutic and relaxing not car crash and paralysis.
THE KITCHEN
I am picking off one room at a time to get prepared for the sale. I am going to clean it up and stage it. I decided to start with the kitchen. The challenge is that this kitchen has 1967 cabinets and appliances. I thought I would capture the retro charm that is so in style now - or at least I tell myself that. Years ago, I bought window cell shades to allow the light to peek in and provides an airy feeling. I didn't realize how scummy they get from years of food splatter. For years, I have stared at these gross levelers. It occurred to me today, maybe I can clean them? I looked it up on the Internet and there were the directions to remove spots and grime. I went to my local K-Mart (hate this store) and picked up the cleaning products which was generally a white sponge and upholstery cleaner. I was so excited about my find that I tested it on one of the shades. It cleaned up beautifully. So basically I have settled for dirty blinds because I was too stupid to figure out how to clean them. I am gross and my house will look better as we move then when we lived in it = pretty pathetic.
Realization
I guess I should be happy that I can get massages - even a bad one is better than not having one at all. I think I will try someone else next time. I am finding myself doing a lot of head circles and hearing that crunchy noise. Realization two - I need to take better care of my next house but next time you can rest assure that I buy the proper window coverings.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
DAY 87 - PEE IN THE CUP AND SHUT UP
As part of the background check process, I had to fill out a medical questionnaire and then go to a clinic for a drug test. The medical checklist felt weird because I have a sedentary job and knowing if I have hemorrhoids or constipation did not seem relevant. I felt strange wondering who was going to see this information. The company claims it goes to the medical department but you never know if your peers and subordinates will see this information. Nothing like losing immediate credibility if they know that you are incontinent. There was a space to fill out your height and weight. If I put down a model's weight, would they question me on it??? I guess you do what needs to be done to get the position.
The second part of the screen is to go for a drug test. There was a lab conveniently located near the house. I drove up to the building and thought, wow this is in a nice building. I went inside and the office was located in the basement. There were glass doors with normal businesses and then there was an ugly white door. It had the name of the lab but did not look like a door you were supposed to enter. It looked like it was to the broom closet. I tried to open the door and it felt locked. I then walked down the hall to see if I got the location wrong --- I did not. I went back to the maintenance door and opened it. It was in fact a waiting room - very uninviting.
I went up to the desk to be curtly greeted by a lab assistant who acted annoyed to be disturbed. She asked me if I had a form and I replied that I had a confirmation number. Before I could read it to her, she pulled the paper out of my hand and began to key it in the computer --- ok...
She then barked out an order for me to wash my hands - I did it. Then she told me to take the cup into the bathroom, fill it up 1/2 way with pee and not to flush the toilet. Yes maam.... I did not want to make her mad because she could mess with the results - if you know what I mean... As I was sitting on the toilet and filling up the cup, I wondered if people poop in there too? How embarrassing would that be since she did not want us to flush. She sort of deserved to flush a crap.
Once I was done, I came up with the sample and placed it on the wrong counter. Silly me for not wanting to parade pee in front of the reception of drug users on a specimen weekly check. She then, told me to wash my hands again - not sure why I had to do it again but I did. She made me initial the pee and be on my way. What a delightful experience? She was scary but I did not want to piss her off --no pun intended or was it.
Realization - I am sure the medical review is just a careful scan to ensure that everyone is physically and legally able to do their job. I am sure oompa loompas have a lifting restriction. Realization 2 - the lab assistant probably hates her job because all she does all day is to direct people to pee in a cup and gets sick of the stupid jokes we try to make to mask our embarrassment.
The second part of the screen is to go for a drug test. There was a lab conveniently located near the house. I drove up to the building and thought, wow this is in a nice building. I went inside and the office was located in the basement. There were glass doors with normal businesses and then there was an ugly white door. It had the name of the lab but did not look like a door you were supposed to enter. It looked like it was to the broom closet. I tried to open the door and it felt locked. I then walked down the hall to see if I got the location wrong --- I did not. I went back to the maintenance door and opened it. It was in fact a waiting room - very uninviting.
I went up to the desk to be curtly greeted by a lab assistant who acted annoyed to be disturbed. She asked me if I had a form and I replied that I had a confirmation number. Before I could read it to her, she pulled the paper out of my hand and began to key it in the computer --- ok...
She then barked out an order for me to wash my hands - I did it. Then she told me to take the cup into the bathroom, fill it up 1/2 way with pee and not to flush the toilet. Yes maam.... I did not want to make her mad because she could mess with the results - if you know what I mean... As I was sitting on the toilet and filling up the cup, I wondered if people poop in there too? How embarrassing would that be since she did not want us to flush. She sort of deserved to flush a crap.
Once I was done, I came up with the sample and placed it on the wrong counter. Silly me for not wanting to parade pee in front of the reception of drug users on a specimen weekly check. She then, told me to wash my hands again - not sure why I had to do it again but I did. She made me initial the pee and be on my way. What a delightful experience? She was scary but I did not want to piss her off --no pun intended or was it.
Realization - I am sure the medical review is just a careful scan to ensure that everyone is physically and legally able to do their job. I am sure oompa loompas have a lifting restriction. Realization 2 - the lab assistant probably hates her job because all she does all day is to direct people to pee in a cup and gets sick of the stupid jokes we try to make to mask our embarrassment.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
DAY 86 - REALITY SINKING IN
I got my offer packet today and reviewed all the information. I have to admit that I am excited. Now reality is sinking in... they want me to start on May 10th. I have been given a temporary living allowance and I am trying to perform miracles with this money. At least in my mind I thought this plan would work. I would stay in a dumpy efficiency and save my pennies. I would seek out the cheapest airfare and see the family every 2 weeks or so over the course of a month in a half. Now as I think about the reality of this plan - it already does not work -- chaching (that is the sound of money leaving my bank account). The first dilemma is that my daughter has her recital on Sunday, May 16 at 3:30 p.m. I just went out the week before. I approached the subject with her and then she got all weepy. Ok, the plan to skip the recital is down the drain. Then it is my birthday on May 21 - it seems kind of depressing to be alone on your birthday - alright - I can deal with this and stay in PA. Maybe I will get the forced mercy birthday celebration from new colleagues - awkward. Then I think the following week is labor or memorial day (that will be a long weekend - should be with the family). Then it is my brother in laws and soon to be sister in laws wedding - don't and can't miss that in mid June. I guess the story is that I have a lot of events coming up - yikes - too busy to work apparently.
LOCAL CONTACT
When we went down to check out PA as I told you, we hooked up with the head of the Jewish Community Center. He is a great guy that knows everyone. I wrote and told him that I would be coming down alone soon. I had been given two properties from the company to consider for temporary living in the area. He wrote back and gave me a name of a guy from the community that will rent me property for this purpose. I am supposed to call him. It feels really awkward -- I feel obligated to call and intrigued. What happens if this is just a vacant space that he has not been able to rent - or it sucks. I hope I did not get into something I can't get out of. I am sure it is fine - no I am not actually. It is weird how much trust I am putting in a man I barely know. Our only connection is that we are both Jewish....
REALIZATION - Plans in theory and plans in reality are two different things. Who am I kidding? I hate living in a dump and I have to see my family frequently. I don't want to miss Mother's Day, Recitals, Long Weekends and Weddings. I am going to make it work. So I don't eat.. I just bought a fancy dress for the wedding and a little less of me would probably work better. Realization 2 - I need to trust people as I am going to a new place. How bad can a fellow Jew steer another Jew? We will see... I am sure it is fine!! I mean he is taking a risk too - I could be a total psycho and he is laying his reputation on the line. The things we do for religion!!
LOCAL CONTACT
When we went down to check out PA as I told you, we hooked up with the head of the Jewish Community Center. He is a great guy that knows everyone. I wrote and told him that I would be coming down alone soon. I had been given two properties from the company to consider for temporary living in the area. He wrote back and gave me a name of a guy from the community that will rent me property for this purpose. I am supposed to call him. It feels really awkward -- I feel obligated to call and intrigued. What happens if this is just a vacant space that he has not been able to rent - or it sucks. I hope I did not get into something I can't get out of. I am sure it is fine - no I am not actually. It is weird how much trust I am putting in a man I barely know. Our only connection is that we are both Jewish....
REALIZATION - Plans in theory and plans in reality are two different things. Who am I kidding? I hate living in a dump and I have to see my family frequently. I don't want to miss Mother's Day, Recitals, Long Weekends and Weddings. I am going to make it work. So I don't eat.. I just bought a fancy dress for the wedding and a little less of me would probably work better. Realization 2 - I need to trust people as I am going to a new place. How bad can a fellow Jew steer another Jew? We will see... I am sure it is fine!! I mean he is taking a risk too - I could be a total psycho and he is laying his reputation on the line. The things we do for religion!!
Monday, April 26, 2010
DAY 85 - POST OFFER PROCESS
I have officially begun the post offer pre hire phase. This is the time where you have an offer contingent on background check, references and drug screen. I know I really don't have anything to worry about ... but I do... What happens that the one person they know who knows me doesn't like me? What happens if they change their mind .. cold feet? What happens if I was too much of a pain in the butt during negotiations? What happens if I ask too many questions? I am trying to balance my need to know and control everything with letting the process just move forward. I think I may just be crazy.. but I am only sharing it with my loyal followers.
Everyone has been coming up to me and congratulating me. It is hard to get too excited until all these checks are completed. I am cautiously happy but not moving forward on other activities that would in fact jinx the offer. I mean I should really be getting the house in order, buying some work clothing and saying my adieus... and I do nothing but the usual. I have always been superstitious and probably a little OCD too!!
My family has been super supportive and happy and yet sad that I am leaving. It is really nice that they are so proud of me. I find it funny that I am actually going to a smaller company doing the same role than my previous one. This company has a stronger name recognition so I guess it means something more to them. I sure hope I get a huge discount on chocolate cause everyone is hitting me up for some.
DOING HOMEWORK
I am writing this blog right now because my daughter has taken me over the edge. I have realized that I have no patience for homework and all the lame excuses she comes up with not to do it or drag it out. IT was a beautiful day today and she made an agreement with her dad that she would do her homework after her playdate and dance class... big mistake. Now she is whining that she is hot and tired and wants to do it in morning. Yet she does not want to wake up early to do it. After an episode with math homework which could totally be done in 5 minutes yet she managed to screw it up and it took over 20 minutes with a lot of mistakes... I lost it.. completely came unglued. I can't stand wasting time and shotty homework... I go nuts..... Thank goodness for some therapeutic blogging. Have I told all of you how much I appreciate teachers.. what an impossible job.
Realization - Therapy would be a good option for me. I have gotten so paranoid that the shoe is going to drop and spoil this opportunity - I even realize my mental illness. Realization 2 - I am not going to win mother of the year award tonight. I need to learn patience instead of freaking out on my daughter. Who is in control mommy or an eight year old? By the way as I am writing this, I was called into my bedroom because my daughter put two disks in the CD player and it sounded like the machine would blow up... this is my night... yikes.
Everyone has been coming up to me and congratulating me. It is hard to get too excited until all these checks are completed. I am cautiously happy but not moving forward on other activities that would in fact jinx the offer. I mean I should really be getting the house in order, buying some work clothing and saying my adieus... and I do nothing but the usual. I have always been superstitious and probably a little OCD too!!
My family has been super supportive and happy and yet sad that I am leaving. It is really nice that they are so proud of me. I find it funny that I am actually going to a smaller company doing the same role than my previous one. This company has a stronger name recognition so I guess it means something more to them. I sure hope I get a huge discount on chocolate cause everyone is hitting me up for some.
DOING HOMEWORK
I am writing this blog right now because my daughter has taken me over the edge. I have realized that I have no patience for homework and all the lame excuses she comes up with not to do it or drag it out. IT was a beautiful day today and she made an agreement with her dad that she would do her homework after her playdate and dance class... big mistake. Now she is whining that she is hot and tired and wants to do it in morning. Yet she does not want to wake up early to do it. After an episode with math homework which could totally be done in 5 minutes yet she managed to screw it up and it took over 20 minutes with a lot of mistakes... I lost it.. completely came unglued. I can't stand wasting time and shotty homework... I go nuts..... Thank goodness for some therapeutic blogging. Have I told all of you how much I appreciate teachers.. what an impossible job.
Realization - Therapy would be a good option for me. I have gotten so paranoid that the shoe is going to drop and spoil this opportunity - I even realize my mental illness. Realization 2 - I am not going to win mother of the year award tonight. I need to learn patience instead of freaking out on my daughter. Who is in control mommy or an eight year old? By the way as I am writing this, I was called into my bedroom because my daughter put two disks in the CD player and it sounded like the machine would blow up... this is my night... yikes.
Friday, April 23, 2010
DAY 84 - CANDYLAND IN GRASP
OFFER PROCESS
It is hard to believe but I got a verbal offer today - Day 84 (not counting weekends). I am really excited because it was a good one too!!! However, I have to stay cool cause I am not there yet. I still need to go through the background check and drug screen process. For some reason, I am nervous... why -- I don't do drugs (except I may have eaten a poppy seed bagel - isn't that always the excuse) and I have been very solid with my work history. But you never know... So I am happy but I am trying to stay calm until it is all complete, signed sealed and delivered.
I AM MOVING
The family is nervously excited about this opportunity but now we totally love our house. At least I do. I feel bad and am thinking will the next buyer be kind to the house? Will it be taken care of and appreciated? I am so weird... but there has been a lot of history in this home... It was our first place, we brought our puppies to this house, we brought our newborn daughter to this house, we bought real furniture for the house... wow ... sounds kind of pathetic as I write about it.
REALIZATION
I am close to the end of this journey and this blog (thank g-d - totally running out of material). It seems so strange how this is working out -- I would have never guessed this outcome but I am strangely happy and content. Realization 2 - My house will be fine and there will be a new house with new memories...
It is hard to believe but I got a verbal offer today - Day 84 (not counting weekends). I am really excited because it was a good one too!!! However, I have to stay cool cause I am not there yet. I still need to go through the background check and drug screen process. For some reason, I am nervous... why -- I don't do drugs (except I may have eaten a poppy seed bagel - isn't that always the excuse) and I have been very solid with my work history. But you never know... So I am happy but I am trying to stay calm until it is all complete, signed sealed and delivered.
I AM MOVING
The family is nervously excited about this opportunity but now we totally love our house. At least I do. I feel bad and am thinking will the next buyer be kind to the house? Will it be taken care of and appreciated? I am so weird... but there has been a lot of history in this home... It was our first place, we brought our puppies to this house, we brought our newborn daughter to this house, we bought real furniture for the house... wow ... sounds kind of pathetic as I write about it.
REALIZATION
I am close to the end of this journey and this blog (thank g-d - totally running out of material). It seems so strange how this is working out -- I would have never guessed this outcome but I am strangely happy and content. Realization 2 - My house will be fine and there will be a new house with new memories...
Thursday, April 22, 2010
DAY 83 - STILL WAITING
Yes, I am still waiting for the offer and it seems like forever. I know that the company is working hard to get the information together and I am sure on their end - time is passing by quickly. I need to remember this time concept when I get back into recruiting - it is excruciating.
It was another day of not knowing what to do with myself. I just sort of hung out, ran, hung out, got my teeth whitened and hung out. I have lost all drive to be productive right now. I mean there is a million things I could do like read a good book, clean th house, volunteer or play with my daughter but I do none of those things. I just hang out... so lame... tick tock tick tock tick tock... oh I did do laundry and also watched my friend build me a bench in the front hall.
THIS AMERICAN LIFE
My friend Kelley told me almost a year ago about the podcast "This American Life" and how it was so good. She described it as unusual and also everyday stories told through the eyes of Ira Glass. For some reason I did nothing with this information until now. I gotta tell you that I am an American Life junky. I look forward to my run and hearing Ira Glass. Now you would say, who wants to hear from a guy named Ira - but I gotta tell you, I think I have the hots for him. He is so interesting and I love his voice. Is that wrong... a married woman who craves Ira? Anyways, I highly recommend listening to these podcasts. They last a little less than 1 hour and they are able to make interesting and uninteresting topics riveting.
REALIZATION - I just need to relax and let the offer process roll the way it is going to roll. I can't control it and therefore I just need to carry on and act normal. I mean this company wants to hire calm and cool interview me not psycho anxious waiting for an offer me. Realization 2 - My crush is harmless and helps me to stay in shape. Listening to podcasts is a lot more healthy than drugs, drinking and gambling .. I think I am ok??? Don't tell my husband.
It was another day of not knowing what to do with myself. I just sort of hung out, ran, hung out, got my teeth whitened and hung out. I have lost all drive to be productive right now. I mean there is a million things I could do like read a good book, clean th house, volunteer or play with my daughter but I do none of those things. I just hang out... so lame... tick tock tick tock tick tock... oh I did do laundry and also watched my friend build me a bench in the front hall.
THIS AMERICAN LIFE
My friend Kelley told me almost a year ago about the podcast "This American Life" and how it was so good. She described it as unusual and also everyday stories told through the eyes of Ira Glass. For some reason I did nothing with this information until now. I gotta tell you that I am an American Life junky. I look forward to my run and hearing Ira Glass. Now you would say, who wants to hear from a guy named Ira - but I gotta tell you, I think I have the hots for him. He is so interesting and I love his voice. Is that wrong... a married woman who craves Ira? Anyways, I highly recommend listening to these podcasts. They last a little less than 1 hour and they are able to make interesting and uninteresting topics riveting.
REALIZATION - I just need to relax and let the offer process roll the way it is going to roll. I can't control it and therefore I just need to carry on and act normal. I mean this company wants to hire calm and cool interview me not psycho anxious waiting for an offer me. Realization 2 - My crush is harmless and helps me to stay in shape. Listening to podcasts is a lot more healthy than drugs, drinking and gambling .. I think I am ok??? Don't tell my husband.
Day 81 & 82 - TIME KEEPS TICKING
I have been really excited because the recruiter told me that I would be getting an offer from Candyland. I discussed my salary requirements and others needed so that I could have a more straight forward negotiations. I figured if there was a recruiter involved, I should use her to handle the haggling and that I could just have a nice conversation with my potential new boss.
The call was scheduled for Wednesday at 8:00 a.m. and I must admit I barely slept in anticipation. All my discussions about salary etc... have been very conceptual so I was not sure where Candyland was coming in at. I was also instructed by the recruiter to be able to discuss my request for a sign on bonus if the subject came up.
8:00 a.m. the phone rings and it is the boss and she is really friendly. We discuss Hershey's and how my visit went. I told her that we were all on board and would really like to be a part of the team. She then said to me that she would put the offer together and had the compensation vice president ready to assist her. Ah... I thought I was actually getting the offer during the phone call. Instead it was a discussion about getting the offer together. The wind pulled out of my sail. Ok, I need to save this...She said that she would try to have the offer completed by the end of the week or beginning of next. I know this does not seem like a big deal but when you are the one waiting it feels like eternity... So here I am waiting.... and waiting...
AIMLESS SHOPPING
I had a vision that yesterday was going to be about crunching the numbers, moving forward and accepting the position. Instead it turned into fielding calls from friends asking me if I got the job. It is so embarrassing because too many people know and I have no status to report. I decided to run some of my empty errands but it still was not helping. I went shopping and that did not help either. I mean I have no business shopping right now - so that whole internal dialogue was going on. I did run and that helped get my mind off of this limbo state.
TOO PLAN OR NOT TO PLAN - THAT IS THE QUESTION
So I am very superstitious and also fairly task oriented (obsessed with not wasting time). But I don't want to start prepping the house for a sale and packing yet, I am sitting here doing nothing. I am afraid to keep other opportunities alive or start new networking. Very weird place I am in. So.. I sit and wait and do nothing. I hope I am taken out of my self imposed misery soon.
REALIZATION
I told too many people about this opportunity and I have pressure to continue to report on the status. I should have kept my mouth closed until it was final. Realization 2 - Shopping should cease and desist and I should continue to network as they say - it ain't over till the fat lady sings...
The call was scheduled for Wednesday at 8:00 a.m. and I must admit I barely slept in anticipation. All my discussions about salary etc... have been very conceptual so I was not sure where Candyland was coming in at. I was also instructed by the recruiter to be able to discuss my request for a sign on bonus if the subject came up.
8:00 a.m. the phone rings and it is the boss and she is really friendly. We discuss Hershey's and how my visit went. I told her that we were all on board and would really like to be a part of the team. She then said to me that she would put the offer together and had the compensation vice president ready to assist her. Ah... I thought I was actually getting the offer during the phone call. Instead it was a discussion about getting the offer together. The wind pulled out of my sail. Ok, I need to save this...She said that she would try to have the offer completed by the end of the week or beginning of next. I know this does not seem like a big deal but when you are the one waiting it feels like eternity... So here I am waiting.... and waiting...
AIMLESS SHOPPING
I had a vision that yesterday was going to be about crunching the numbers, moving forward and accepting the position. Instead it turned into fielding calls from friends asking me if I got the job. It is so embarrassing because too many people know and I have no status to report. I decided to run some of my empty errands but it still was not helping. I went shopping and that did not help either. I mean I have no business shopping right now - so that whole internal dialogue was going on. I did run and that helped get my mind off of this limbo state.
TOO PLAN OR NOT TO PLAN - THAT IS THE QUESTION
So I am very superstitious and also fairly task oriented (obsessed with not wasting time). But I don't want to start prepping the house for a sale and packing yet, I am sitting here doing nothing. I am afraid to keep other opportunities alive or start new networking. Very weird place I am in. So.. I sit and wait and do nothing. I hope I am taken out of my self imposed misery soon.
REALIZATION
I told too many people about this opportunity and I have pressure to continue to report on the status. I should have kept my mouth closed until it was final. Realization 2 - Shopping should cease and desist and I should continue to network as they say - it ain't over till the fat lady sings...
Monday, April 19, 2010
DAY 78, 79 & 80 - BACK FROM CANDYLAND
Hello ... I am back and bet you have been waiting with anticipation (yeah right). Well I can say that the trip was great. I think I may become a candy girl. A little twist from industrial and aerospace.
It is funny how the second time around... you see things in a different way. When I visited candyland the first time around, it was a cold and rainy day. Everything looked small town and kind of touristy. This trip all I saw were hills, mountains, sun and nature.
I was greeted by a driver who took me to Hotel Candy. I was given the royal treatment starting with a huge bag of all the candy this company makes... oh boy there goes the diet. This hotel is gorgeous and played classical music in the hallways... it was a far different experience from the Candy Lodge the first time around.
I went downstairs as I was starving and thought - who cares if I am the weird girl eating alone in a nice restaurant. I tried to keep busy by reviewing my interview questions for the next day or read the paper. The table was really small and it was hard to do anything but stare off into space and wait for my food. A couple was seated next to me and I felt strange cause I was the third wheel on a shared booth space... I mean nothing is a bigger drag than going out for a fancy romantic meal with your spouse and there is someone sitting next to you alone. Anyways, I tried to give them space but they turned to me and introduced themselves. I began to talk to them and let them know that I was thinking of relocating. Next thing I know we are best friends and end the night with a card exchange. I now have a hair dresser and a place to take my daughter for dance lessons. It was amazing how friendly and open they were to me. This is not something I think would happen in my current city.
The next morning I woke up early to take a quick jog before my interview. I always feel like a run before a major event gets me in prime form. I decided to run outside and tackle some new terrain. I was feeling good about my time starting out but the second half really kicked my butt. Pennsylvania is very hilly and I found myself taking inclines and realizing that I was not in as good of shape as I thought I was... There was a point that I was literally walking up the hill and just panting like a wimp. I guess that is a good goal for my next level of fitness training.
The meetings at the company went smoothly and it was everything that I remembered it to be. But I was confused if I was still interviewing or if I had the job. There was major cryptic messaging going on between myself and the interviewers. Some of my meetings were for me to get more information about the area and others were interviews. I was so confused about my status at the end of the day. Generally everyone seemed to like me so I let it go.
My husband and daughter met me for day 2 where we were going to see the area. The morning started out with us visiting the Director of the Jewish Community Center. He was really nice and gave us a tour of the facility, showed us the synagogues and then gave us a quick drive through "where jews live." It sounds so funny but I imagine it happens with every culture. My daughter and I sat in the back of the mini van as he drove us up and down the hills. At first we pretended we were on a roller coaster and then it turned to car sickness. I don't know how kids don't barf sitting in a mini van when you really can't open the side windows --- can you say nightmare? I was so scared that we were going to vomit in this guys car.
My daughter and husband opted out of round two which was out with the realtor. She was super nice but really wanted to sell us the area near candyland. It was hard for me to articulate that we wanted to live near the jews. She could not imagine why we would want to do that... She showed me some properties and let's just say that I thought I lived in a dump. These houses needed a lot of work and one house had the scariest basement with creepy little rooms. We opened up one and it had a wheelchair in it. My mind started racing about what that room was used for. Did they keep the handicapable child in that room??? Freaky.. This did not seem like a happy house.
All and all - we had an excellent time and believe we would be up for the move. This area has a welcoming community, good cost of living and the job seems like an excellent opportunity.
Realization - We look at situations with our own blinders on. I was so negative about what I thought this company was about instead of having an open mind - if I had decided not to take the interview I would have missed out on my next career move. Realization 2 - I like to be wooed and courted and wanted... these extra touches really help to influence my decision and most of all my families. Realization 3 - I have come to appreciate the great home I have today and hope we can find another that we love as much as this one.
It is funny how the second time around... you see things in a different way. When I visited candyland the first time around, it was a cold and rainy day. Everything looked small town and kind of touristy. This trip all I saw were hills, mountains, sun and nature.
I was greeted by a driver who took me to Hotel Candy. I was given the royal treatment starting with a huge bag of all the candy this company makes... oh boy there goes the diet. This hotel is gorgeous and played classical music in the hallways... it was a far different experience from the Candy Lodge the first time around.
I went downstairs as I was starving and thought - who cares if I am the weird girl eating alone in a nice restaurant. I tried to keep busy by reviewing my interview questions for the next day or read the paper. The table was really small and it was hard to do anything but stare off into space and wait for my food. A couple was seated next to me and I felt strange cause I was the third wheel on a shared booth space... I mean nothing is a bigger drag than going out for a fancy romantic meal with your spouse and there is someone sitting next to you alone. Anyways, I tried to give them space but they turned to me and introduced themselves. I began to talk to them and let them know that I was thinking of relocating. Next thing I know we are best friends and end the night with a card exchange. I now have a hair dresser and a place to take my daughter for dance lessons. It was amazing how friendly and open they were to me. This is not something I think would happen in my current city.
The next morning I woke up early to take a quick jog before my interview. I always feel like a run before a major event gets me in prime form. I decided to run outside and tackle some new terrain. I was feeling good about my time starting out but the second half really kicked my butt. Pennsylvania is very hilly and I found myself taking inclines and realizing that I was not in as good of shape as I thought I was... There was a point that I was literally walking up the hill and just panting like a wimp. I guess that is a good goal for my next level of fitness training.
The meetings at the company went smoothly and it was everything that I remembered it to be. But I was confused if I was still interviewing or if I had the job. There was major cryptic messaging going on between myself and the interviewers. Some of my meetings were for me to get more information about the area and others were interviews. I was so confused about my status at the end of the day. Generally everyone seemed to like me so I let it go.
My husband and daughter met me for day 2 where we were going to see the area. The morning started out with us visiting the Director of the Jewish Community Center. He was really nice and gave us a tour of the facility, showed us the synagogues and then gave us a quick drive through "where jews live." It sounds so funny but I imagine it happens with every culture. My daughter and I sat in the back of the mini van as he drove us up and down the hills. At first we pretended we were on a roller coaster and then it turned to car sickness. I don't know how kids don't barf sitting in a mini van when you really can't open the side windows --- can you say nightmare? I was so scared that we were going to vomit in this guys car.
My daughter and husband opted out of round two which was out with the realtor. She was super nice but really wanted to sell us the area near candyland. It was hard for me to articulate that we wanted to live near the jews. She could not imagine why we would want to do that... She showed me some properties and let's just say that I thought I lived in a dump. These houses needed a lot of work and one house had the scariest basement with creepy little rooms. We opened up one and it had a wheelchair in it. My mind started racing about what that room was used for. Did they keep the handicapable child in that room??? Freaky.. This did not seem like a happy house.
All and all - we had an excellent time and believe we would be up for the move. This area has a welcoming community, good cost of living and the job seems like an excellent opportunity.
Realization - We look at situations with our own blinders on. I was so negative about what I thought this company was about instead of having an open mind - if I had decided not to take the interview I would have missed out on my next career move. Realization 2 - I like to be wooed and courted and wanted... these extra touches really help to influence my decision and most of all my families. Realization 3 - I have come to appreciate the great home I have today and hope we can find another that we love as much as this one.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
DAY 77 - GETTING READY
It takes a lot of preparation to get ready for an interview and now I have a rhythm down. First I do research using Hoovers (thanks to my outplacement group) and then I thoroughly check the company's website looking for opportunities where I could add value. I then go out to Linked In and check out my potential interviewers to get a sense of who they are and their interests. Like for instance, one of the gals I am interviewing with seems to follow the HR VP from one company to another so they are apparently tight. Good to know!!! I look for the morsels of truth to open up the connection quickly.
I then put together a packet of information on myself. I always think it is important to differentiate yourself from the pack. I include a nice resume, some examples of my work that is pertinent to the audience and the position, a skills matrix of my abilities and then a nice little PR puff piece that was done on me in the former job. I have this down to a science. This is not what I want to do as I am totally ready for a job and leaving all this needless work to show my worth to a company. Using my lean training, I have mastered the most efficient job and interview preparation process possible.
CANDYLAND PACKING
As I mentioned, the entire family is coming to see the area and this is so challenging to pack efficiently for various events. I have my interview stuff, my workout stuff, my play stuff, my daughter's play stuff, my daughter's look cute outfits if someone from my potential employer happens to see us and of course my husband's stuff. Not only does he pack his clothes but he brings a huge volume of reading material, ipod and computer stuff and therefore we look like the Beverly Hillbillies trudging through the airport.
I think the company is serious too because they are putting us up at the nice hotel. Last time I stayed at the Lodge which was disappointing. I now feel a little more important then I did hanging out with the conference dudes from my last visit.
Not sure if I will be able to write over the next few days so stay tuned and wish me luck... I am running out of things to write about. I never thought this blog would have gone on for 77 days... aaahh..
REALIZATION
I suppose it is good to have a process to get ready and interview effectively with companies. I seem to get a good reaction with my preparation and personalized folders. I have learned to be a great self marketer... Maybe I should think of a change in profession. Realization 2 - I guess it is better to look like a tourist and have everything that you need instead of packing light and forgetting your bathing suit. Wish us luck as we load our 3 bags plus a few more carry-ons a small plane for an extended weekend.
I then put together a packet of information on myself. I always think it is important to differentiate yourself from the pack. I include a nice resume, some examples of my work that is pertinent to the audience and the position, a skills matrix of my abilities and then a nice little PR puff piece that was done on me in the former job. I have this down to a science. This is not what I want to do as I am totally ready for a job and leaving all this needless work to show my worth to a company. Using my lean training, I have mastered the most efficient job and interview preparation process possible.
CANDYLAND PACKING
As I mentioned, the entire family is coming to see the area and this is so challenging to pack efficiently for various events. I have my interview stuff, my workout stuff, my play stuff, my daughter's play stuff, my daughter's look cute outfits if someone from my potential employer happens to see us and of course my husband's stuff. Not only does he pack his clothes but he brings a huge volume of reading material, ipod and computer stuff and therefore we look like the Beverly Hillbillies trudging through the airport.
I think the company is serious too because they are putting us up at the nice hotel. Last time I stayed at the Lodge which was disappointing. I now feel a little more important then I did hanging out with the conference dudes from my last visit.
Not sure if I will be able to write over the next few days so stay tuned and wish me luck... I am running out of things to write about. I never thought this blog would have gone on for 77 days... aaahh..
REALIZATION
I suppose it is good to have a process to get ready and interview effectively with companies. I seem to get a good reaction with my preparation and personalized folders. I have learned to be a great self marketer... Maybe I should think of a change in profession. Realization 2 - I guess it is better to look like a tourist and have everything that you need instead of packing light and forgetting your bathing suit. Wish us luck as we load our 3 bags plus a few more carry-ons a small plane for an extended weekend.
Monday, April 12, 2010
DAY 76 - BACK TO CANDYLAND
I will be returning to PA to meet some more people and look around the area with a Realtor and my local representative of the Jewish Community. It is starting to get serious. I have been forwarded the relocation policy and temporary living brochure. I am really going through mixed emotions now. I am obviously excited with this opportunity but sad that I have to leave Michigan. I am a sentimental person and I am going to miss my house. It wasn't a big house, or a perfect house but I was our home. So many memories both great and few not so great. I wonder if I will be able to love a house as much as I love this one? I guess you adjust... I guess you look for features that the old one lacked... I guess you upgrade to make yourself feel like it was worth the move.
I have also have found myself in observation mode alot recently. I mean if we go everything keeps moving forward here. Yes, there are a few people that are upset, but mostly everyone goes on with their daily routine if we are here or not... weird... It has been interesting too, the people who seem most effected are not the ones I would have expected. My close friends and family understand but it is nice when people express their true feelings that we will be missed. I wonder if we will be able to make deep and lasting relationships in PA? I hope my daughter can find those few best friends!! I hope this is the right move? My gut tells me yes and it is usually right. I will just follow my instincts and see if this comes together or not. With my track record, offers evaporate in an instance.
REALIZATION
This is really starting to get real and for the first time I will need to step out of my personal comfort zone and test the family on our agility. Realization 2 - I think everything will work out and I am being too sappy... but I love my little old house with the green shutters.
I have also have found myself in observation mode alot recently. I mean if we go everything keeps moving forward here. Yes, there are a few people that are upset, but mostly everyone goes on with their daily routine if we are here or not... weird... It has been interesting too, the people who seem most effected are not the ones I would have expected. My close friends and family understand but it is nice when people express their true feelings that we will be missed. I wonder if we will be able to make deep and lasting relationships in PA? I hope my daughter can find those few best friends!! I hope this is the right move? My gut tells me yes and it is usually right. I will just follow my instincts and see if this comes together or not. With my track record, offers evaporate in an instance.
REALIZATION
This is really starting to get real and for the first time I will need to step out of my personal comfort zone and test the family on our agility. Realization 2 - I think everything will work out and I am being too sappy... but I love my little old house with the green shutters.
Friday, April 9, 2010
DAY 75 - TOO BUSY AGAIN
Today I met with an executive recruiter for a role as the Director, Talent Management with a major construction company. I am happy to report that I did not embarrass myself too bad.
I was greeted by him and told instantly that he had a hard stop at 2:30 which was 53 minutes from the time we started the discussion. I guess I never get recruiters that don't have time to interview the candidates. This is starting to be a pet peeve of mine. I mean if I was the employer paying about 30% of the candidate starting salary, I would expect my recruiter to really know the history and motivation of the candidate. I felt that this recruiter would not be able to represent me in any sort of detailed manner. Maybe my expectations are set too high - who knows.
OK so I said we had 53 minutes for the interview and I think 15 minutes revolved around HR geography. I always find this as the kiss of death. When we venture off the topic at hand and start talking about the who's who.
I knew we were running out of time so I went to my hard sales pitch about what I could do. I also tried to act smart by anticipating some of the problems this company may be experiencing. They had recently acquired a competitor. I started expounding on that fact that they probably needed assistance with bringing the two company cultures together and accessing talent. He then said to me, oh that purchase was only assets sale - none of the people were brought on board. OK, how embarrassing was that. I did my little soft shoe and moved to the next topic.
He finished by saying he liked my experience and background. He wanted to speak with me longer next week on the phone to fill me in on the company. I guess I passed the test. We will see...
TEACHING MY DAUGHTER HOW TO SKATE
My daughter has decided that she wants to learn how to roller skate. I am of course thrilled as it is great exercise and fun. I bought her skates, knee and arm pads to cushion any potential falls. For the last three days, I have spent approximately an hour each day spotting her from behind so she doesn't fall and paralyse herself (I am Jewish mother - what can I say). The problem is that I do not know how to teach her to glide on her skates. So we basically walk up and down on the street with her skates. I am stooped over her from behind to prevent falls. It is a real workout as my thighs are screaming for mercy... I hope she learns how to roll soon...
REALIZATION
I guess I should not worry about the depth of the interview from the executive recruiter. It is their job to sell us and they need to do that successfully to put food on the table. I am going to let it go... but it is annoying. Realization 2 - Having a leg workout while teaching my child a new skill is what you call "killing two birds with one stone." I will keep squatting knowing that I will be the proudest parent in the world when she glides down the street on her own.
I was greeted by him and told instantly that he had a hard stop at 2:30 which was 53 minutes from the time we started the discussion. I guess I never get recruiters that don't have time to interview the candidates. This is starting to be a pet peeve of mine. I mean if I was the employer paying about 30% of the candidate starting salary, I would expect my recruiter to really know the history and motivation of the candidate. I felt that this recruiter would not be able to represent me in any sort of detailed manner. Maybe my expectations are set too high - who knows.
OK so I said we had 53 minutes for the interview and I think 15 minutes revolved around HR geography. I always find this as the kiss of death. When we venture off the topic at hand and start talking about the who's who.
I knew we were running out of time so I went to my hard sales pitch about what I could do. I also tried to act smart by anticipating some of the problems this company may be experiencing. They had recently acquired a competitor. I started expounding on that fact that they probably needed assistance with bringing the two company cultures together and accessing talent. He then said to me, oh that purchase was only assets sale - none of the people were brought on board. OK, how embarrassing was that. I did my little soft shoe and moved to the next topic.
He finished by saying he liked my experience and background. He wanted to speak with me longer next week on the phone to fill me in on the company. I guess I passed the test. We will see...
TEACHING MY DAUGHTER HOW TO SKATE
My daughter has decided that she wants to learn how to roller skate. I am of course thrilled as it is great exercise and fun. I bought her skates, knee and arm pads to cushion any potential falls. For the last three days, I have spent approximately an hour each day spotting her from behind so she doesn't fall and paralyse herself (I am Jewish mother - what can I say). The problem is that I do not know how to teach her to glide on her skates. So we basically walk up and down on the street with her skates. I am stooped over her from behind to prevent falls. It is a real workout as my thighs are screaming for mercy... I hope she learns how to roll soon...
REALIZATION
I guess I should not worry about the depth of the interview from the executive recruiter. It is their job to sell us and they need to do that successfully to put food on the table. I am going to let it go... but it is annoying. Realization 2 - Having a leg workout while teaching my child a new skill is what you call "killing two birds with one stone." I will keep squatting knowing that I will be the proudest parent in the world when she glides down the street on her own.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
DAY 74 - OH BOY
Tomorrow I am interviewing for a Talent Development and Management Director role for a major home building organization. So I started doing research on the company. One of the things I like to do is go through their website and analyse their career page and associated messaging. This is where I usually have a field day with great ideas or improvement opportunities. The problem here is that they have done an amazing job. The person who writes for their website really turned the speak into conversation. The company hits on all the major ideas such as culture, who fits in, diversity and inclusiveness and career progression. OK so you ask, what is the issue? I think that I may not be able to take them forward. It is very apparent that whoever held the role previously did a great job. Yikes... what am I going to say? This may be a humiliating experience. It is tough when you interview at companies that may in fact do it better than any company you have previously worked with. I guess I better get my tap shoes out and do my dance.
THE TOE
I am a shoe girl and love to keep in style with newest trends that are coming out. I also like to have cools shoes for the interview. I tend to go with a pointy pump as it elongates the ankle. I never understood the ladies who chose the sensible shoe and sacrificed style for comfort. I swore I would never become one of those gals. I have also realized that everything I told myself I would never do I have changed my tune and done. The only thing that I still cling to is that I will never drive a mini van.
Anyways, now I am noticing from all the running and tap dancing of my past, that my left big toe really refuses to bend at all. This is causing me problems in the shoe arena. I am also noticing that I can't keep my balance with high heels anymore. I keep on twisting to the side right off the heel. It has led to some humiliating experiencing. There was one time that I practically rolled down the stairs after flying a smaller business jet.
Now - my feet are starting to rebel against my shoes. I can't even slide my left foot in without excruciating pain. I need to take a stiff drink before I put the shoe on. I think I see a future of ugly shoes. I am so scared.
REALIZATION
If I think logically for a second - what company is total truthful on their website? It is usually aspirational and I will interview towards their future state mission. Realization 2 - I guess comfortable shoes are part of the journey as you get older - it is just inevitable. I suppose reading glasses are next for me. It is g-d's crazy joke on how to continue to make us women feel less attractive as we get older.
THE TOE
I am a shoe girl and love to keep in style with newest trends that are coming out. I also like to have cools shoes for the interview. I tend to go with a pointy pump as it elongates the ankle. I never understood the ladies who chose the sensible shoe and sacrificed style for comfort. I swore I would never become one of those gals. I have also realized that everything I told myself I would never do I have changed my tune and done. The only thing that I still cling to is that I will never drive a mini van.
Anyways, now I am noticing from all the running and tap dancing of my past, that my left big toe really refuses to bend at all. This is causing me problems in the shoe arena. I am also noticing that I can't keep my balance with high heels anymore. I keep on twisting to the side right off the heel. It has led to some humiliating experiencing. There was one time that I practically rolled down the stairs after flying a smaller business jet.
Now - my feet are starting to rebel against my shoes. I can't even slide my left foot in without excruciating pain. I need to take a stiff drink before I put the shoe on. I think I see a future of ugly shoes. I am so scared.
REALIZATION
If I think logically for a second - what company is total truthful on their website? It is usually aspirational and I will interview towards their future state mission. Realization 2 - I guess comfortable shoes are part of the journey as you get older - it is just inevitable. I suppose reading glasses are next for me. It is g-d's crazy joke on how to continue to make us women feel less attractive as we get older.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
DAY 73 - REJOICE
Today I went to the funeral of my old family nanny Rachel. It was in Detroit and I was feeling a little blue that she had passed away. I asked myself if I had done enough for her over the years, should I have called more and really hoped she knew I loved her. I was very also concerned that she may not have had a lot of friends as she was older and had not been married or had kids. Boy, was I pleasantly surprised. The entire ceremony was about rejoicing, praising g-d and singing uplifting songs. It turns out that Rachel touched many many peoples lives. It was incredible for me to hear about her other life. Her involvement in her church and community. As a matter of fact, this funeral lasted over 2 hours as 1 hour was dedicated to people speaking about how special she was and how she touched their lives. My husband commented that this is the first time that he was sitting in a warm room for over 2 hours and did not fall asleep. All and all it really made me think about character and living a pure life. That is something Rachel did each and every day. It was a pleasant surprise and made me feel very honored to be such a part of her life.
SKIN SITUATION
I have an interview in two days and wouldn't you know I am a cyclopes again. It doesn't help when my husband fixates on my zit and cracks jokes about my third eye. I am once again on the aggressive skin care regime to get it off my face. I keep imagining the scene in Austin Powers when he fixates on the mole (spy) who had a mole or Uncle Buck and the principle with a growth on her face. I think he threw her a quarter to get that thing knawed off. I really need to take care of this one quick.
WHAT DO I DO WITH MYSELF?
For as long as I have been off of work, I still have not developed a schedule - which is my outplacement's kiss of death warning. I find myself questioning what I am going to do each and everyday. It starts out with me checking my e-mail and reviewing my searches overnight. Then I drift, I start looking at the gossip on line, review the sales of clothes I do not need, go to linked in and then facebook. Next thing I know I am off doing chores around the house, chatting with my husband, going for a run and then getting a diet coke. I really have no purpose and I am certainly not looking for a job in the manner that would exhibit success. This is really bad...
REALIZATION
I think Rachel's church has the right philosophy about turning sadness into thanks that the deceased were a part of our life and that now they can be one with g-d. It is a really comforting message and made me feel at peace when I left the church. It also made me want to continue to strive for honest living and intentions so I have no baggage when I meet my maker. Realization 2 - I should by stock in Proactiv (company that makes products for bad skin). I mean if it works for Jessica Simpson why not me? Realization 3 - I have always been unconventional and I just pray it works for me when it comes to finding employment.
SKIN SITUATION
I have an interview in two days and wouldn't you know I am a cyclopes again. It doesn't help when my husband fixates on my zit and cracks jokes about my third eye. I am once again on the aggressive skin care regime to get it off my face. I keep imagining the scene in Austin Powers when he fixates on the mole (spy) who had a mole or Uncle Buck and the principle with a growth on her face. I think he threw her a quarter to get that thing knawed off. I really need to take care of this one quick.
WHAT DO I DO WITH MYSELF?
For as long as I have been off of work, I still have not developed a schedule - which is my outplacement's kiss of death warning. I find myself questioning what I am going to do each and everyday. It starts out with me checking my e-mail and reviewing my searches overnight. Then I drift, I start looking at the gossip on line, review the sales of clothes I do not need, go to linked in and then facebook. Next thing I know I am off doing chores around the house, chatting with my husband, going for a run and then getting a diet coke. I really have no purpose and I am certainly not looking for a job in the manner that would exhibit success. This is really bad...
REALIZATION
I think Rachel's church has the right philosophy about turning sadness into thanks that the deceased were a part of our life and that now they can be one with g-d. It is a really comforting message and made me feel at peace when I left the church. It also made me want to continue to strive for honest living and intentions so I have no baggage when I meet my maker. Realization 2 - I should by stock in Proactiv (company that makes products for bad skin). I mean if it works for Jessica Simpson why not me? Realization 3 - I have always been unconventional and I just pray it works for me when it comes to finding employment.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
DAY 72 - EMBARRASSING MOMENT
I have an interview on Friday for a local Organization and Development role. The company is the largest home builder in the U.S. I have heard mixed reviews on the company - but what the heck - I am a free agent. So today I am chatting with several neighbors about this interview. Yes, I am like the prom queen on our block now. We talk about the happenings on the street, my unemployment, our kids etc... As I said dipping into a new reality. When I worked, I spoke to noone with the exception of a quick hello. Getting back to the story, I commented on this company and one neighbor informed me that I actually live in a house made by this organization. Here I am putting the company down for their cheap homes and I live in one. How embarrassing - I am a real ass. What else is new?
Blane is back
Remember Blane, the recruiter I thought was scamming me. He is back!!! He called me last week and wanted me to return his call. I wrote him an e-mail to clarify his angle. I asked him to verify how and who pays him when he makes a placement. I told him I was thrown off with his report which he charges $200 for - it just seems suspicous. He confirmed that he was either a retained or contingent recruiter based on the company's preference. He gets paid by the client company. Ok, as long as I won't receive a bill, I was alright with talking to him. He is in California so he seems to always call me at night and I always miss his call. He indicated that he was taking the week off for Spring Break with his family. I wrote him and told him to have a nice vacation and I would speak with him in a week or so. But I see again tonight, he has called again after hours. I really have a strange relationship with this guy as I have not been presented to any company with him. It is like he wants to chat... strange.
FEMALE BONDING
My daughter who is 8 has been off of school for about a one week and a half. It is kind of dumb to me but being in a Jewish Day School - they honor Passover. This holiday goes on for 8 days. But frankly, I don't know anyone that does more than 2 days of it. I say take your Matzah to go and let's get back to school.
She was having a rough morning (can I say an 8 year old was having PMS like symptoms). So I thought it would be fun to catch a movie. The day was kind of rainy. We both wanted to see the new Miley Cyrus movie. I have to admit that I am a fan. I have her song, Party in the USA on my ipod. (Just to clear a fact up - I did not like it initially when she did that stripper pole thing at the Grammys or American Music Awards or Kids Choice - it sort of grew on me later). It was really a cute movie - young love, beaches, deciding what college to go to etc.. And then it takes a sad twist in the last 30 minutes of the movie. So much for light fun.. Let's just say that it has the same twist as Dumbo, Lion King, Bambi (hint parent exits) aaah.
REALIZATION
I am an idiot with my first thoughts about companies. I don't know what the hell I am talking about until I do major research. I have been wrong everytime I think. Realization 2 - I am going to let Blane enjoy his vacation and deal with him next week. Realization 3 - I should have probably read a preview of the movie before taking my emotionally fragile child who actually was not as affected as much as mommy - who moistened with her tears about three napkins and let out a grunt of despair that totally embarassed her child.
Blane is back
Remember Blane, the recruiter I thought was scamming me. He is back!!! He called me last week and wanted me to return his call. I wrote him an e-mail to clarify his angle. I asked him to verify how and who pays him when he makes a placement. I told him I was thrown off with his report which he charges $200 for - it just seems suspicous. He confirmed that he was either a retained or contingent recruiter based on the company's preference. He gets paid by the client company. Ok, as long as I won't receive a bill, I was alright with talking to him. He is in California so he seems to always call me at night and I always miss his call. He indicated that he was taking the week off for Spring Break with his family. I wrote him and told him to have a nice vacation and I would speak with him in a week or so. But I see again tonight, he has called again after hours. I really have a strange relationship with this guy as I have not been presented to any company with him. It is like he wants to chat... strange.
FEMALE BONDING
My daughter who is 8 has been off of school for about a one week and a half. It is kind of dumb to me but being in a Jewish Day School - they honor Passover. This holiday goes on for 8 days. But frankly, I don't know anyone that does more than 2 days of it. I say take your Matzah to go and let's get back to school.
She was having a rough morning (can I say an 8 year old was having PMS like symptoms). So I thought it would be fun to catch a movie. The day was kind of rainy. We both wanted to see the new Miley Cyrus movie. I have to admit that I am a fan. I have her song, Party in the USA on my ipod. (Just to clear a fact up - I did not like it initially when she did that stripper pole thing at the Grammys or American Music Awards or Kids Choice - it sort of grew on me later). It was really a cute movie - young love, beaches, deciding what college to go to etc.. And then it takes a sad twist in the last 30 minutes of the movie. So much for light fun.. Let's just say that it has the same twist as Dumbo, Lion King, Bambi (hint parent exits) aaah.
REALIZATION
I am an idiot with my first thoughts about companies. I don't know what the hell I am talking about until I do major research. I have been wrong everytime I think. Realization 2 - I am going to let Blane enjoy his vacation and deal with him next week. Realization 3 - I should have probably read a preview of the movie before taking my emotionally fragile child who actually was not as affected as much as mommy - who moistened with her tears about three napkins and let out a grunt of despair that totally embarassed her child.
Monday, April 5, 2010
DAY 71 - SPRING BREAK
I was busy today with errands and enjoying the nice weather. It occurred to me at about 3:00 that I have not really done anything with the job search. It is like I am getting used to not working. I have created a new routine and it just seems since forever that I actually went to work. Wow... I am morphing into a suburbia housewife. I even forgot for awhile. Scary....
RUSSIAN ROULETTE
The calls have slowed down in the last two weeks and I am not sure if it is because of the holidays and spring break or if I am not keeping my karma open for new opportunities. It is like I am so laser focused on this particular job that I have taken myself off of the market in a way. I am really playing Russian Roulette because this opportunity can dry up so fast that I will be left with a fresh search - which honestly I am not thrilled to start again. I am getting so bored reading, hearing etc.. about new opportunities. They all sound the same and I just want this part to be over.
THE HOUSE
As we are thinking about a potential move, we are starting to look at our house in a different way. It does not help that I obsessively watch HGTV. There is a show that is on a majority of the time that deals with staging for a home sale. I am appalled with some of the homes on this show. However, when you take off the rose colored glasses, you start noticing your home is a dump too. We have cracked paint, holes in our ceiling, drawers that are falling apart in the kitchen and I am sure I carpet is a nightmare due to our old dogs who took many liberties in our home. It is really a daunting task.
PUTTING THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE
When I was growing up, we had a housekeeper named Rachel. She was from Detroit and we became fast friends. She practically raised me and also introduced me to some very important matters such as soap operas, how to avoid loser guys and the penny slot machines. She was a part of the family and a huge influence on me as I grew up. Last week she passed away after having a stroke outside the casino. I will really miss her but I was glad she went out doing what she loved.
REALIZATION
Deep in my heart I know this is going to work out and I will be employed soon. I do have minor freak outs but I am feeling much more settled recently. I just hope my intuition is correct. Realization 2 - It is important to focus on the important things like family, friends and enjoying each day of life. This unemployment is a minor blip on my life. Having meaningful relationships that help you grow and be connected is the most important thing. Rachel was one of my anchors and I appreciated her. I hope she is having fun at the big casino in heaven... peace and love.
RUSSIAN ROULETTE
The calls have slowed down in the last two weeks and I am not sure if it is because of the holidays and spring break or if I am not keeping my karma open for new opportunities. It is like I am so laser focused on this particular job that I have taken myself off of the market in a way. I am really playing Russian Roulette because this opportunity can dry up so fast that I will be left with a fresh search - which honestly I am not thrilled to start again. I am getting so bored reading, hearing etc.. about new opportunities. They all sound the same and I just want this part to be over.
THE HOUSE
As we are thinking about a potential move, we are starting to look at our house in a different way. It does not help that I obsessively watch HGTV. There is a show that is on a majority of the time that deals with staging for a home sale. I am appalled with some of the homes on this show. However, when you take off the rose colored glasses, you start noticing your home is a dump too. We have cracked paint, holes in our ceiling, drawers that are falling apart in the kitchen and I am sure I carpet is a nightmare due to our old dogs who took many liberties in our home. It is really a daunting task.
PUTTING THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE
When I was growing up, we had a housekeeper named Rachel. She was from Detroit and we became fast friends. She practically raised me and also introduced me to some very important matters such as soap operas, how to avoid loser guys and the penny slot machines. She was a part of the family and a huge influence on me as I grew up. Last week she passed away after having a stroke outside the casino. I will really miss her but I was glad she went out doing what she loved.
REALIZATION
Deep in my heart I know this is going to work out and I will be employed soon. I do have minor freak outs but I am feeling much more settled recently. I just hope my intuition is correct. Realization 2 - It is important to focus on the important things like family, friends and enjoying each day of life. This unemployment is a minor blip on my life. Having meaningful relationships that help you grow and be connected is the most important thing. Rachel was one of my anchors and I appreciated her. I hope she is having fun at the big casino in heaven... peace and love.
Friday, April 2, 2010
DAY 70 - THINGS ARE FINE
Ignore yesterday's ranting and raving, everything is fine in Candyland. I received a call from the executive recruiter and the issue for next week was a mere Spring Break/Vacation thing. Apparently some of the folks they want me to meet are out on vacation. Phew....
CONEY ISLAND LOOK ALIKES
My husband, daughter and I went to the local Coney Island Restaurant for a weekly greek salad, chilli cheese fries and egg white omelete. Anyways, I had the weirdest observation, I guess it was the first time I was paying attention. Ok.. the observation is that I look like every other girl in my town. We all have curly brown hair, were wearing cargo cropped olive pant, t-shirts and over the shoulder across the body purses. It was kind of an Agressa (spelling) moment. This is a Weeds mini series reference - great show - check it out. Tiny boxes we all live in ticky tacky little boxes and we all do just the same. The point of this nonsense is that I was hesitant to move because of the uniqueness of my hometown. Yet, we are all the same... weird. Never noticed.
REALIZATION
I need to realize that when you are unemployed your time clock moves slower than business. I need to think about how many more people are involved around the interview on their side. It is a good lesson for me to remember when I begin recruiting again for a company. There needs to be a lot of communication touch points to avoid candidates from freaking out (like me). Realization 2 - I guess you take on the look of your town. I wonder if I move what my new look will morph into. Maybe blond, jeans and a satchel bag... haha... HAPPY EASTER
CONEY ISLAND LOOK ALIKES
My husband, daughter and I went to the local Coney Island Restaurant for a weekly greek salad, chilli cheese fries and egg white omelete. Anyways, I had the weirdest observation, I guess it was the first time I was paying attention. Ok.. the observation is that I look like every other girl in my town. We all have curly brown hair, were wearing cargo cropped olive pant, t-shirts and over the shoulder across the body purses. It was kind of an Agressa (spelling) moment. This is a Weeds mini series reference - great show - check it out. Tiny boxes we all live in ticky tacky little boxes and we all do just the same. The point of this nonsense is that I was hesitant to move because of the uniqueness of my hometown. Yet, we are all the same... weird. Never noticed.
REALIZATION
I need to realize that when you are unemployed your time clock moves slower than business. I need to think about how many more people are involved around the interview on their side. It is a good lesson for me to remember when I begin recruiting again for a company. There needs to be a lot of communication touch points to avoid candidates from freaking out (like me). Realization 2 - I guess you take on the look of your town. I wonder if I move what my new look will morph into. Maybe blond, jeans and a satchel bag... haha... HAPPY EASTER
Thursday, April 1, 2010
DAY 69 - DID I JINX MYSELF
I am a little superstitious to say the least. I never allow a hat to go on a bed; if a black cat crosses my path -- I go the other way... etc. etc. etc. I am always cautious not to get ahead of myself on matters in fear that they will not work out. Today, I got a call from the recruiter that our trip to PA next week was postponed. She indicated scheduling difficulties but she would let me know. Now having come from recruiting it certainly is logical to think that this company could not line up everyone on a popular vacation week (right after Easter). But of course, because I am unemployed and damaged - I go to that bad place. Was there something I did? Did they get cold feet? Did they realize I am a loser and came to their senses? See this is my internal demons playing out. Maybe I jinxed myself because I wrote about it or told too many people. Maybe I am insane and should be institutionalized now.... Well everyone keep your fingers crossed that it is merely a scheduling issue on their end and has nothing to do with me or their lack of interest.
SLEEP OVER
My daughter is 8 years old and loves the idea of sleep overs with her friend. She loves them in concept but when it comes times for execution she always backs out, gets sick or generally has a break down. I am not a big fan of them because I enjoy my sleep and I think they are a pain in the as*. When she has her friend sleep here, my daughter falls asleep early and the friend stays up late (usually I have to entertain in some manner - awkward). Then my daughter wakes up at the crack of dawn and the friend sleeps in. Either way, I get screwed having to pick up the late and early end. Not to mention the foul mood the following day. I HATE SLEEPOVERS. Last time, my daughter got violently sick while the friend was over in the middle of the night. I had to put her in a different room so we would not wake up the friend and it was a nightmare. Let's wish for better luck. I love being a mom but this is not a task that I willingly signed up for.
DAY 69
I suppose by the number of this day - I should be having fun (a little dirty humor). But I find myself so frusterated that it has been several months since I worked. I am trying to fill the hole and keep myself busy but honestly I don't know what to do with myself. I feel so bad for me that I have been indulging in massages, pedicures, shopping and generally things that I should not be spending our rent money on... It does feel the void for about 5 minutes. At least I will be the most relaxed and best dressed bum around.
Realization
When I recruited, I remember the candidates being anxious and the company trying to speed the interview process along. We too rescheduled candidates and dragged the process out. I have to put my faith in this company that they are operating without a Recruiting Director and this may have some bumps. Realization 2 - Alcohol is good for sleepovers for me. I can let the girls have a free for all and I can go pass out in my bedroom. Dad is home.
SLEEP OVER
My daughter is 8 years old and loves the idea of sleep overs with her friend. She loves them in concept but when it comes times for execution she always backs out, gets sick or generally has a break down. I am not a big fan of them because I enjoy my sleep and I think they are a pain in the as*. When she has her friend sleep here, my daughter falls asleep early and the friend stays up late (usually I have to entertain in some manner - awkward). Then my daughter wakes up at the crack of dawn and the friend sleeps in. Either way, I get screwed having to pick up the late and early end. Not to mention the foul mood the following day. I HATE SLEEPOVERS. Last time, my daughter got violently sick while the friend was over in the middle of the night. I had to put her in a different room so we would not wake up the friend and it was a nightmare. Let's wish for better luck. I love being a mom but this is not a task that I willingly signed up for.
DAY 69
I suppose by the number of this day - I should be having fun (a little dirty humor). But I find myself so frusterated that it has been several months since I worked. I am trying to fill the hole and keep myself busy but honestly I don't know what to do with myself. I feel so bad for me that I have been indulging in massages, pedicures, shopping and generally things that I should not be spending our rent money on... It does feel the void for about 5 minutes. At least I will be the most relaxed and best dressed bum around.
Realization
When I recruited, I remember the candidates being anxious and the company trying to speed the interview process along. We too rescheduled candidates and dragged the process out. I have to put my faith in this company that they are operating without a Recruiting Director and this may have some bumps. Realization 2 - Alcohol is good for sleepovers for me. I can let the girls have a free for all and I can go pass out in my bedroom. Dad is home.
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